Thursday, July 26, 2012
Gardening Horribilis: What Not to Do in the Garden
There were no pink flamingos or garden gnomes, at least, although once in a while the right pink flamingo staged in just the right spot does have its appeal (or maybe this small nostalgia for pink flamingos dates me to my college years on the UW-Madison campus); but on the Portage County Garden Parade there was a lot of the horrible, what not to do in a garden.
Handsome Son knew there was something wrong. Suddenly his mother was in a picture-shooting frenzy, like sharks suddenly sensing blood in the water. He gently grabbed my elbow and murmured in my ear, "TIME TO GO!" and dragged me from the garden as I hastily snapped off a last few shots.
There was a garden I visited after the organic CSA, and the gardener with the no-mow buffalo grass lawn that is the sort of garden that makes me shudder. They think they are gardeners and they will have some beautiful flowers in vases on a dining room table somewhere, but they are also the gardeners that probably add plastic cushion protectors to their couches and lamps. They'll no doubt have the "good china" they use only for special occasions. Instead of working with their site and challenges, they use elaborate caging and fencing to get their garden to do what they want it to do rather than allow it to be what it should be.
And then there are the gardens with way to much pricey statuary and elaborate fountains often in their front yards. I don't know about you, but "plastic" and "garden" seems like it should be a non sequitur.
And finally, you KNOW what I think of these!
Instead, walk over to that tree look up into its leafy boughs and give it a big hug. Stand there a moment and feel its life force, and then go grab a hose and water the dang thing!